The Sensuality Temptation, Balancing Hormones and the Noggin

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating issue and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and men use love to obtain sex." This is a fantastic summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where singles translate great sex as love. But those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these singles, making love brings enormous meaning and consequences.

Songs fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they believe sex is a required test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will be excellent as well).

B.more commonly, all consciousness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as soon as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical destination-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with truth when all those hormones are running wild. Our body reacts to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), which makes the opportunity to make love with someone we are drawn in to incredibly hard to withstand. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce feelings), makings us feel really near to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are strong and involuntary , resulting in effective feelings of destination, excitement, nearness, love, and wellness .

However when problems emerge, those who fall under more information the Sex Trap typically justify by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is terrific!" They probably would not confess, but they prioritize physical intimacy and regard the rest as optional. Their main searching tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with gay males, says that numerous of his customers have actually fallen under the Sex Trap.

" For gay males particularly in urbane areas, sex is readily available, and that in itself is a trap," North states. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be good?".

Nevertheless, North adds, "I believe this is a 'guy' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do desire to point out that chemistry is necessary. Chemistry is a given that we cannot manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there read this post here for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry occur, though in some cases Read Full Report it can grow gradually.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication wears away and truth hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This indicates combining chemistry with common sense. While great sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you require to make your partner options by paying complete focus on your vision, values, requirements, and objectives -- while feeling all those interesting sparks!

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